Stages of adjusting to vision loss
A big theme in my work is how we cope with loss of control. It starts with not being able to read the label on a pill bottle or recognize a friend's face. This awareness triggers the physical and social trauma.
Next comes shock and denial. Thoughts like I cannot believe my eyes. This cannot be happening. Maybe my eyesight will bounce back. There must be something I can do. This is not who I am.
Recognizing powerlessness over the diminishing eyesight is followed by mourning and withdrawing from people, places, and things. Fear the world is unsafe looms large. Feeling misunderstood further isolates a person. It helps to talk with someone who understands or has been there, to know you are not alone.
Depression is the next step in adjusting to vision loss. At this stage a reason to get out of the house and engage in meaningful activity helps. Talking about attitudes toward vision loss, including any self-limiting beliefs the visually impaired person may harbor, and setting realistic goals represent forward momentum.
The tide begins to turn when the connection to responsive rehab professionals occurs. By that I mean vision rehabilitation instructors teaching independent living skills, not doctors offering medical treatment. Developing a realistic working knowledge of vision rehab options really expands choices. And offers hope.
With exposure to new ways of doing things comes a reassessing of what is possible. I can still take that trip. Maybe I can go back to work. Small successes add up. As new practical skills come online mobilizing into the future seems possible.
Newfound confidence takes hold once a visually impaired person becomes fully equipped with the emotional coping and non-visual techniques it takes to do everyday things.
One on one counseling encourages this progress by:
offering a safe space to process whatever is on your mind and regain a sense of control. Listening and emotional support in peer groups can cause fear of judgment or comparison, whereas risking vulnerability is less frightening in 1:1 counseling
putting names to the big feelings (am I feeling overwhelmed? Scared? Terrified? Lonely? Embarrassed?)
bringing accountability with scheduled times to address any feelings a person may be experiencing and support that there are no "bad" feelings, all feelings provide useful information
As a person feels safe enough to open up tension in the body and noise in the mind dissipate. Challenging old ways of thinking without judgment becomes possible. Automatic negative thoughts can be identified and replaced with more supportive messages. Responding in different ways repeatedly creates new neural pathways in the brain over time.
A friend says the #1 need of blind people is other blind people. I agree. Relating to others who understand in a peer group setting is extremely valuable. In addition, experiencing the psychological safety to open up at a deeper level, learn individualized emotional self-regulation skills, and address personally traumatic experiences fosters self-knowledge and confidence in a tailored way.
Change your mind, change your life.